By Brandon T. Bisceglia
Girls practice self-defense techniques at a Nov. 17 event sponsored by Milford-based Maren Sanchez Home Foundation, while Storm, the Bridgeport Sound Tigers mascot, looks on. The foundation is partnering with the Sound Tigers as part of a fundraising push to expand nationally. Photo by Brandon T. Bisceglia.
Mixed martial arts champion “Notorious” Nick Newell stood pinned against the wall of his recently-opened gym in Milford on Nov. 17, surrounded by a crowd of nearly 30 girls.
Newell had invited them into his Fighting Arts Academy on Quarry Road to help them learn self-defense techniques and build self-confidence as part of an event organized by the Maren Sanchez Home Foundation, a Milford-based nonprofit.
“What I want to do is turn sideways here, like this,” Newell told his audience as he demonstrated how to retake control from his against-the-wall predicament. “Then I’m going to take these two fingers and shove them in – there’s a little spot right here in the throat – and I’m going to clamp down.”
Newell has offered lessons of this type before for MSHF, which is dedicated to educating and empowering girls and young women to defend themselves against emotional, psychological and verbal manipulation and physical violence.
This event was a little different than usual, though, because it was open to anyone from the public. Until now, most of the three-year-old organization’s events have been held for distinct groups, such as businesses, high schools and universities around Connecticut.
This autumn, MHSF has launched a campaign to raise money to expand its offerings across the nation. It is hoping to bring in $25,000 on Giving Tuesday so that it can take its lectures and self-defense programs to girls around the country.
The organization got its start in the wake of a local tragedy. Maren Sanchez, a 16-year-old student at Jonathan Law High School in Milford, was stabbed to death by a fellow student in the school’s hallway on April 25, 2014. She was attacked by a friend in retaliation for turning down his invitation to the junior prom.
Maren’s mother, Donna Cimarelli, said that she formed MSHF to make sure that what happened to her daughter would be less likely to happen to others.
“A few days after Maren was taken from us, I realized that the tragedy happened for a reason, and that she may not physically be here, but I still was,” she said. “I really felt that I was given a job to do.”
Cimarelli said she wanted from the beginning to focus on safety for young women, especially psychologically.
“If you understand how to keep yourself psychologically and mentally sound, then there’s a good chance that you may not get physically harmed,” she said.
She began with a series of “HER-Self Awareness” lectures to call attention to red flags and other signals of danger that she had come to understand through her experience with own daughter.
Brian Bannon, who sits on the MHSF Board of Directors, became involved with the foundation because his own daughter was good friends with Maren. Bannon said he joined to help keep Maren’s name alive and to help make sure no other girl goes through what she did.
“Donna has done a great job of tying in self-awareness and self-defense, because you can always be aware and not have the physical capabilities, or you can have the physical capabilities and not be aware,” he said. “So I think these are to critical points to teach these girls self-confidence.”
Board treasurer Lisa Perschino Smith said many young girls don’t realize that some conduct, such as being texted, called or contacted on social media constantly, isn’t appropriate.
“It might not hit them right away that this behavior is not okay – the obsessiveness and possessiveness,” she said. “It’s all aspects of communicating healthy relationship behavior.”
Perschino Smith came on board in 2016 and said the MSHF’s growth has been incredible. The foundation hosted its first workshop over the summer during which a group of speakers came in to speak to the participating girls about different topics. It has also launched “Maren’s Magical Moments,” spending afternoons doing activities with the seniors at the Atria assisted living community in Shelton.
“It is growing very, very quickly, which I’m thrilled to be a part of,” she said.
The current fundraising campaign will culminate on Nov. 29 with “Maren Sanchez Home Foundation Night” at the Webster Bank Arena in Bridgeport, where the Bridgeport Sound Tigers will play the Springfield Thunderbirds. A portion of ticket revenue from the game will be donated to the MSHF.
Newell will lead another self-defense demonstration during the game. There will also be an opportunity to sing along with Maren during the first intermission, and MSHF-themed Sound Tigers swag available for purchase.
The team is proud to be partnering with local organizations like MSHF, said Tarah Kelly, who works in group sales for the Sound Tigers. Kelly herself is a Milford resident who attended Jonathan Law two years ahead of Sanchez.
“This is something that means a lot to me personally,” she said, “and it’s good that the Sound Tigers are able to do something like this for a local organization that benefits young girls everywhere.”
Cimarelli said she hopes that the growth of MSHF can help more young women to realize their own strength.
“When young women say ‘no,’ the majority of the time they are not heard. So we want make sure that they understand that their voice is powerful, and that when they say ‘no’ it’s a complete sentence, just like when a boy says it.”