The Fine Art Of Standing In Line

By David Crow
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David Crow

No one likes it, but we all do it from time to time. We have to do it because that is the way the world works. In fact, we’ve all just been through a season where we do it more than at any other time of the year.

What am I talking about? Standing in line, of course.

I was standing in line at the bank the other day with seven or eight other people. I didn’t like it, but I couldn’t come up with a way to avoid it. So I made a face of grim resignation, which was the same face everyone else in line at the bank that day was making, and took my place at the end of the line. Once I got my spot I did what everyone else was doing and whipped out my cell phone to do nothing in particular but distract myself from the fact that I was standing in line.

As happens from time to time with lines, this one was not going anywhere in a hurry. A couple more people came in after me and (I assume – I had my nose buried in one of my six to ten email accounts) made that same face of grim resignation and got in line behind me.

Then a woman behind me said, “Happy holidays.”

I didn’t look up immediately because I was lost in cyberspace, so she said it again. I looked up this time. I didn’t recognize her as anyone I knew, but I nodded to her and returned her greeting. That’s when she offered me a peppermint candy. I felt myself smile as I said, “Thank you” and took the candy. While I popped it in my mouth, she began passing out candies to all the other people standing in line.

That’s when a strange thing happened. Everyone stopped making that face of grim resignation and we all put away our cell phones. Smiles were exchanged. Then, very cautiously, a conversation broke out. First we just commiserated about having to stand in line, agreeing it wasn’t our favorite thing to do during the holidays but couldn’t be helped. With the ice broken, people began to chat more amicably. The line quickly bent into a knot of people all facing one another and conversing. More people came in, and after receiving their candies joined the knot of chatting people. Suddenly standing in line didn’t seem like such a chore.

It seemed that I got to the front of the line sooner than I expected. I was a little disappointed that it was my turn to go to the window to conduct my business, because it meant stepping out of the knot of people and the bubbling conversation. After I finished my business, I went back to the knot to say goodbye. As I walked to my car, I didn’t really remember what we talked about but I knew I enjoyed my time in line. I also admonished myself a bit that a person who enjoys conversations like I do had missed so many golden opportunities to talk to new people because I had viewed standing in line as, at best, an inconvenience and at worst some kind of cosmic test of character.

Because of Sara the economics major who wants to pursue an MBA or maybe go to law school, I’ve got a pocket full of peppermint candies and I’ll be leaving my cell phone in my pocket as I take my place at the rear of the line. I’ve resolved in 2020 to relearn the fine art of standing in line. So if the bald guy behind you says “hello” and offers you a peppermint candy, don’t get creeped out. Just smile and we’ll help each other pass the time.

Until next time, y’all come out!

David Crow is a lawyer who lives in Orange.

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